Age Gaps In RelationshipsOne of the benefits this article will avail you after you have finished going through it is an honest appraisal of the subject matter; which is, whether there is something to actually worry about having an affection for a man far older than you. Putting aside your feelings or anxieties and the things you probably have heard or read from various sources about this matter, you would be able to reach a personal conclusion on whether it is a right decision you are taking in dating a man older than you. Perhaps we should begin by first explaining in context what being "Older than you" means. It is generally assumed in most cultures of the world that the man should be older than the woman he is going out with. The fact remains that the origin and basis for this general assumption are unclear. Perhaps, we can trace it to our various religions that tend to support that. But then, what is expected in a typical relationship anywhere in the world today is that the man should be some years advanced in age compared to his spouse or girlfriend. Age Gaps In Relationships
There isn't very much guessing while you're dating older men. They will be honest with you about what they want, where they stand and where your relationship will go. Older men don't hide things and aren't going to waste time leading you on - most of the time. When a guy is in his 20s, he still wants freedom, so they don't want to settle down or make a commitment. It's like they are still in high school and just want to party and live life day by day.
Most younger guys aren't thinking about anything more than that, so they aren't sure what they want from a relationship. They just know they like you and want to keep you around.
Older men are different because they know what they want. If it's casual, they will tell you; if it could lead to more, they will tell you. If they are looking for a wife and want to have children, you will know.
Older men have been there, they aren't going to play games unless that's who they are, but we will get to that later on. If they haven't done it already, most older men are ready to settle down. Some might have been there and won't go back into a marriage. However, for the most part, an older man in his mids is ready to settle down and have a family. At this point, they already have gone to college, have an established career, and are now ready for a wife and family.
If you are looking to settle down, you will have better luck with an older man than a guy in his 20s.
A man in his 20s who wants to settle down, especially if he is only years out of high school, is hard to find. A post shared by old love young oldmanyoungwoman on Nov 12, at am PST.
The dating game was never my thing. When I was in high school and even college, I hated it. One thing that always drew me to older men was that they don't play games.
If they are interested, you'll know, as you won't have to wait days to see if he will text or call. Now, there are some older men who have always played games, and this is why they are still single. Be careful of those ones.
If he's willing to play games in the beginning, it's my advice to be very careful because he will probably always be playing some kind of game with you and your heart. Older men who are worth your time don't want to play games.
They are serious about your relationship, even if it's casual. This is one of my favorite things about dating older men! Every relationship has its downside.
Some of those downsides are worth dealing with, others aren't. Some of the 'red flags' or cons of a relationship should automatically tell you to run. Here I have listed the most common cons I have found about dating older men.
Certainly age is just a number. But what that number means may have impact or not. I've dated men much older and somewhat younger than I. Are you attracted to men who are 10 years older than you or more? Here are the pros and cons of dating older men. This is one of my biggest pet-peeves and it doesn't matter if I'm dating someone in their 20s, 30s, or 40s. A man who treats. Dating. The Pros And Cons Of Dating An Older Man. Anna Nicole Smith If he's lived an extra 10 years longer than you, he's likely to have the.
This definitely isn't a comprehensive list. I hope this helps you decide whether the man you're dating is worth staying with, or if the downside is just too much to bear.
I don't necessarily think that older men do this on purpose, but I guess some do. If that's true, then they probably did it on purpose when they were in their 20s as well. In that case, I'm not sure I would bother with them. I do, however, seem to take it in stride when an older man I'm dating does this. It generally comes out when they are trying to give you advice. I don't think they mean to be condescending, but when someone 10 years older than you or more is giving you advice about a job or another situation, at times he can be condescending.
Again, I tend not to take this personal, but some people do. If this is a pet-peeve of yours, then I would say that my advice would be to take a closer look and maybe even talk to him about it. If it seems like he's doing it often and it's just becoming too much, then maybe it's time to look for a new guy.
This is one of my biggest pet-peeves and it doesn't matter if I'm dating someone in their 20s, 30s, or 40s. A man who treats me like a child when we fight and have an argument is not a man I want to be with. This is different than him being condescending. It's when he scolds you, shames you, or makes you feel like a small child when you have 'done something wrong', and that is how he will put it too.
It won't ever be his fault. Again, I don't care if the guy is older or not, but this is one of those things that I have no patience for.
My advice would be to get out now. You deserve to be treated better than that! Older men can definitely be more controlling than younger men in their 20s or so.
I think this comes from their experience and they may not mean this to be negative, as it is more like they are trying to protect you.
Some men are very controlling in a way that is clearly abusive. I am dating a man right now who can be controlling at times, but I've noticed that he does it in a way that is more of trying to protect me. He wants me to be safe, and he wants me to be a strong and independent woman, but when I needed new tires, he made calls and took care of it.
He took control and handled it. This is a way older men can take care of us, it's how they show they care. Be observant. If you are with an older man who is controlling about things like getting your tires changed and making sure you are safe and taken care of, that's one thing. However, if he is controlling about who you hang out with, what you spend your time doing, etc. Just beware. Older men are known to be 'stuck in their ways'. Have you heard the saying: "You can't teach an old dog new tricks"?
Well, from my experience, I can tell you this is definitely true.
Better With Age: 10 Pros And Cons Of Dating An Older Man
Older men have their routine, and they know what they like and what they don't. Don't think that you will burst into his life and that he will stop everything and change for you. If you don't like who he is, how he dresses, how he does his hair and what he watches on TV, then it may be safe to say that he isn't the guy for you. This is one con that is tough to avoid. It is difficult to overlook the fact that we all age. When you are dating a man who is 10 years older than you, the day will come where he may actually look and act his age.
It's tough to say when that will be, since some men age amazingly, but it happens to us all. Gravity will take over. Wrinkles will appear. He won't have the endurance he once had. Things will change.
Pros and cons of dating someone older than you
For some couples, this isn't an issue. However, it is a hard thing to ignore. Before you go all in with an older man, you may want to think about this and think about if it will bother you 10 years from now, or even One of the great things about dating someone in their 20s, or closer to your own age, is that you get to experience a lot of first situations together.
There are endless 'firsts' to talk about, and for some this isn't a big deal. But is it for you? Your first love.
Your first engagement. Your first child. Your first, and hopefully your only, wedding. It may be silly, but for some older men, these things have already happened. They don't want a big wedding because they've had one. So listen and see what you can learn.
Dating an older man will at least give you a new perspective on men and relationships. He should be kind and loving and meet you in the middle in terms of effort put into a relationship.
He should make you feel like a queen. Love it or hate it? Share your tips in the comments below. Get on the list today! My true passion in life is transforming your love life by giving you specific tools and techniques that you can use immediately to meet the men you deserve. Haa ha, one thing you left out is he is just getting older and older.
Better With Age: 10 Pros And Cons Of Dating An Older Man I always seem to date guys between 10 to 20 years older than me, and from my relationships comes some of the best Why would you date someone that old?. Young Women & Older Men: Dating Pros & Cons if you've ever dated someone 10 years or more older than you, you probably experienced some of the best. Let's discuss some of the pros and cons of dating someone older: experience dating and therefore treat you with more respect than those.
If he is say, 55 and you are 30 when you are 40, he will be 65 and will be getting older by the minute. Get ready to change his diaper. Did you really have to say that. I am dating a 48 year old right now, did not realize his age when we met because he looks so amazing and he can literally make love for hours everyday if I want him to!
Dating an Older Man: Pros, Cons, + Advice For The Modern Woman Whether you believed it then or not, dating in your 40s or older . Clearly, you haven't found what you're looking for yet, so why not go with someone older. The Pros And Cons Of Dating A Man Older Than You . You are sure you are not with a wet-pant who's looking for someone to spoonfeed him. At some point in your dating life, you will be approached by an older man. There are of course many pros and cons to dating a man old enough to with a great vintage Cabernet Franc than going out to the club (hopefully).
I understand your perception and you may be correct in some or many instances. Sure, I may have had more energy back then, but it was like a shotgun blast; some hit the target but other parts of the shots missed entirely. Today, I grab all that wasted energy and make it all count. You do have to work on it and strive to stay healthy physically and emotionally.
What about sorting yourself out…as in whats going on with me that i feel this attraction to an older man…n get the healing you need go through thd process find yourself first…than when your active in who you are n become who you are…youll attract the right man for you…he will find you n see and accept you who you are….
They often shun newer technology; many are jaded about women and hate relationships, and expect you to make all the changes and sacrifices. I agree. I have that same issue and imagine he just wants a nurse in his later years. Older does not mean they are financially stable, mature, or appreciate a younger woman. I prefer older men and I am still single because of the immaturity. My older counterpart was bankrupt and was out there portraying the opposite.
He was looking for someone who could support him. Pls dont date anybody 5 years older!!!! It will ruin your life. Yes, I do recognize those brief moments when our age difference is apparent; but it has never been to the point of feeling inadequate. And I can tell you that at least in my personal experience, I could care less what kind of car he drives or if he has a fancy ass job. What drew me to him is how kind and loving he is, how much he appreciates me, and the fact that he treats me like an equal.
We are completely in-tune with each other on the way we view life. I want companionship, respect, love, and a maturity level that matches mine. I can completely relate to your post.
What we look in a man is something that money can not buy and if you find that in a guy young or older then i think you have hit jackpot! My best wishes for you and your couple. I totally agreed with you. I am dating someone who is 12 years older than me as well. I am a full time student and worker. I got my own everything but want to find someone who is caring, listens, understands, charismatic, make me laugh, be there through the good and bad, talk about anything and everything, and etc.
Advice For Dating Older Men: The Pros And Cons You Need To Know
He is someone special to me. We are there for one another through the good and bad. When he needs advice, cheering up, words of encouragement, laugh, and more I am always there for him as he is for me. I am happy we are growing stronger than ever.
He has salt and pepper hair but it makes him look distinguished. Anyway, we are great together and he treats me very well. I was always attracted to older men but this is my first time dating one.
He is a huge step up from my previous relationship. Everything you listed above is pretty much dead on. I have come to terms with that and I get it. We speak openly to one another and we even work out together. I love that we come together as a team. Regardless of what others may think or say, I am content with this man and we make each other happy.
I have a 9-yr old son and he has two teenage kids. We also have had to learn how to communicate with each other because there are some language differences that interfere from time to time, but we work on our relationship together. We both take care of ourselves… for now. We also mutually respect everything about the other. This article was true to the core in its pros and cons. But I think inevitably everyone will date a personality compatible to theirs.
From the very first time I set my eyes on this gentleman I was attracted! So far 3 months since meeting, 4 official dates I have been completely impressed both sexually and mentally. I have experienced a maturity so far that I am completely smitten with. The same age or younger men I have dated have absolutely no respect for women. Highly recommend! In the beginning we connected so deep and so fast. I talk to him about all the time, and he says no but it just seems a little weird.