Main -> Hookup -> The REAL Reason Hookups Leave You Feeling SO Freaking Lonely . Janet Ong Zimmerman . YourTango

The REAL Reason Hookups Leave You Feeling SO Freaking Lonely . Janet Ong Zimmerman . YourTango


In today's progressive culture, we love believing casual sex , one-night stands, and "hooking up" are what empowered women do. You've had one too many drinks and end up having sex. Does this sound familiar? During sex, the temporary connection you feel in the heat of the moment quickly dissolves into loneliness. Hooking up seemed like such a good idea at the time — it felt fun, sexy , and spontaneous. But now, you're left feeling regretful. Sharing bodily fluids never has the kind of connection as sharing heart-to-heart conversations and deep emotions.

As someone who is open about my sexuality, I grew up being called many derogatory names due to my actions and as a result, became an extremely secretive person for a large portion of my life.

It was also at this time that I started to reevaluate how I viewed people who slept around while also starting to wonder why everyone seemed to care so much. However, despite trying to remain open-minded to my own desires and closed-minded to anyone who tries to judge them, I have continued to catch myself in the dreaded cycle of hookup guilt.

After a night out, I catch myself watching the girls who jump into cabs outside of the bars with guys they met two hours ago and wonder if she, too, will wake up feeling guilty the next morning.

But ladies… what are we truly guilty of? Is having sex with a stranger really that inexcusable? Even as someone who constantly writes about sex and is very open about the topic, I still catch myself questioning my behaviours in fear of judgement.

This is for the guys who have already made it. Has any other guy gotten casual sex and found that it kinda makes you feel like shit? I have tried.

Why is it that women are supposed to be pure and holy virgins while men can indulge in sex as much as they like without being judged? I believe that should be the year we eliminate the stigma surrounding casual sex, start allowing ourselves to fulfill our desires, and stop judging those who already do.

If you hit on a guy at the bar and invite him back to your place, you should feel empowered, not easy! For decades, women have been told to keep an aspirin between their knees, but I say we save the aspirins for our hangovers rather than our hookups.

Jan 26, After all, there's a reason that “hookup culture” became a buzz term. And yeah, it's easy not to feel great about it afterwards, no matter how. Aug 9, Turns out, that inexplicable sadness you may feel after sex is very common. Let's start with a definition of a hookup, since there's actually quite a bit of debate about it, although encounter, feel desirable and excited, and tend not to expect anything from a hookup. Is Constant Texting Good or Bad for Relationships?.

Melanie is a full-time University of Western Ontario student studying English Language and Literature whilst actively pursuing a career in teaching. Melanie loves everything and everyone in her life deeply and unconditionally but holds a special place in her heart for the little ones who have made the biggest impact including Vada, Skye, and Mateo.

It's sooooo messed up, but many girls feel like they've done something really wrong, just because they've hooked up. But…are they? The Gut Check: No doubt, there may be some big questions running through your head: Does this make me slutty?

Are people going to talk about me if they find out?

Mar 4, Whether we want to admit it or not, many of us have felt it—that unexplainable sadness after sex. If you've experienced a feeling of depression. Mar 24, An expert discusses why hooking up can be doing more bad than good. repeatedly is that after a one-night stand, the overwhelming feeling. Mar 23, "A good gut check after a hookup can help give you a clear understanding of your boundaries," says Stardell Smith, a health educator at Mount.

Seriously, forget everyone else! Think: Were you feeling great about your decision…until your friend made a comment?

Feel bad after hookup

Was it safe and respectful, but you feel like you broke the "rules" of your parents or your religion? The truth is, feeling "off" in the aftermath of a make-out sesh should NOT be ignored.

FEAR OF INTIMACY & the 5 Ways to Overcome it - Kati Morton - Love, Relationships, Dating & Sex

You just shared something SO insanely intimate with someone, and now your head is running around in this hyper-aware state. It's like you're waiting for that person to fail you!

Wow, he's the only person who knows about that birthmark on my butt. And shouldn't he have texted me, like, a million times already? Or… does it just feel weird?

But before you put this on them, reflect back on yourself for a sec: What do I want out of this arrangement? Am I getting it? Have I been honest about my feelings… to myself AND to this other person?

Why You Sometimes Feel Sad After Sex, Even When It's Good Sex

Sadly, there's no one foolproof way to proceed from here, but just raising these Qs can help to stop the spiraling. Plus, now you've pushed yourself to tap into your true feelings.

Jun 26, Ask yourself these four questions to see if you'll be blissed out after your New research reveals that feeling blah post-hookup is all too common. you don't have to worry that he'll give you grief or make you feel bad about. May 9, Women in particular feel the 'shame' of sex the most. . Vancouver is still scared to hold big city events even 8 years after Stanley Cup Riot. Mar 10, So we had sex why do I feel so guilty? After a night out, I catch myself watching the girls who jump into cabs outside of the bars with guys.

And that's HUGE. How far do I want to go? And what kind of relationship do I want before that happens?

The great thing is — despite how hard this hurricane of emotions hit you this time around — you now know what you feel comfortable doing and what you don't. And you can use that knowledge to make decisions you feel better about from here on out.

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    1. Excuse, that I can not participate now in discussion - there is no free time. But I will return - I will necessarily write that I think on this question.

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